eBay Rolls out the Jump to Illogical Conclusions Mat

Even though I knew this was coming, it's still completely shameless...

Much media fanfare was raised about the fact that the psychotic perpetrator behind the Virginia Tech shootings bought a single .22 caliber magazine off of eBay. That's right. One magazine that can be bought anywhere. Not the gun. eBay wouldn't touch that. Just the magazine.

After a few months of intense study with their "Trust and Safety Policy Team", eBay has declared that they know how to stop violent madmen from killing people:

In mid-August, we will be updating our Firearms, Weapons and Knives Policy to place more restrictions around gun-related items. Once these changes take effect, we will prohibit listings of any firearm part that is required for the firing of a gun. This includes items like bullet tips, brass casings and shells, barrels, slides, cylinders, magazines, firing pins, trigger assemblies, etc. Please read the Firearms, Weapons and Knives Policy for more details on our current policy.

As you may know, eBay does not allow the listing of any items which are regulated by individual states or the federal government; however, there are still a large number of firearm-related parts that are legal and are widely available in retail stores. These items have also historically been allowed on eBay. After learning that some items purchased on eBay may have been used in the tragedy at Virginia Tech in April 2007, we felt that revisiting our policies was not only necessary, but the right thing to do. After much consideration, the Trust & Safety policy team – along with our executive leaders at eBay Inc. – have made the decision to further restrict more of these items than federal and state regulations require. This new update continues to encourage safety among our community members and brings our policies in the U.S. and Canada in closer alignment with our existing policies in other markets around the globe. Sincerely, Matt Halprin Vice President, Trust & Safety

How ludicrous. They say, "eBay does not allow the listing of any items which are regulated by individual states or the federal government;"

I say, "Bullshit." Do they still allow auctions for automobiles and auto parts? Last I checked, those are pretty heavily regulated by the government. They also are used in crime a lot more often than firearms are.

And what the hell is a "bullet tip"? Never heard of such an animal.

Anyway, as thousands of people are canceling their eBay and PayPal accounts due to this illogical policy decision, some clever people have decided to protest in creative ways.


(Links are provided, but I also took screenshots and pasted the descriptions below. Who knows how long these auctions will remain on their site.)

Bid with confidence!

For Sale: Assault Rock

Description:

In celebration of Ebay’s new firearm parts policy we proudly offer the ONLY genuine, fully automatic ASSAULT ROCK!!!! Get yours fast before Ebay decides you can’t-it seems guns have some legal standing in the Constitution of the United States (not on Ebay). Our crack team of right-wing lawyer wantabees are looking for rock protection as you read this-besides it keeps them from esoteric pursuits such as trying to figure out why liberals exist. These incredible tools started out as just lousy old Colorado granite; but have been transformed into works of art worthy of, and able to induce shock and awe!

Colors available:

Black-a most ominous color, great for swat (literally) work and they immediately strike (that’s what you got it for isn’t it?) fear into your foe’s heart while showing that you care enough to use the very best.

White, while it may look like you stole it from some old lady’s garden, is no less effective, is innocuous enough to look like a paper weight, and great for winter work, but we caution, repeated use may cause staining.

Camo-OF COURSE, why wouldn’t we-after all we are shamelessly promoting this. It is our most popular rock, and its ability to blend-in is legendary and various patterns are available upon request

Natural-while it seems shabby on our part to offer what would seem to be a plain old rock-hey the pet rock phenomena still amazes us. We felt it only proper, and in may cases it would be the best choice at being non-threatening and blending in with the environment-again, hey we want to be able to have some bogus claim to being “green.” We will send you a relatively clean rock with most of the dirt clods knocked off, postage being what it is.

The “designer” rock-custom colors, blends, and jewel be-studded upon request. Price dependant upon upgrades and jewels chosen.

All rocks are fully automatic, never need to be reloaded-as long as you can cock your arm, have a durable dollar store spray paint finish and come with a lifetime guarantee-if used for their intended purpose. Please note: most have minor natural defects that do not affect performance. Please be sure to order the proper size, the largest you can easily wield will be the most effective. It is not our fault if you bring “too much rock” and have difficulty recocking in the fully automatic mode. Remember too little rock usually results it necessity to go “Full Auto” to be effective, and this may be offensive to some passer-bys. We also caution against just going out and getting your own home grown or “reloaded rock” as these are not subject to the rigors of our process and may be easily subject to the penchant of the legal profession to file a suit claiming you are a crazed, right wing, rock loving, Neanderthal, republican, enviro-hating, SUV driving, carbon hogging, God-fearing, aberrant, pervert.

Calibers available:

Humongous-best left to the meanest SOB on the block or a front end loader

Large-for those that have some kind of complex

Medium-best choice for most, a little large to conceal, but will “git-er-done”

Small-best for pocket of purse, may require repeated cycles to be totally effective

Micro only for the well trained in the art of “rockette”-did it take a rocket scientist to know that?

Specifications:

Material – granite, we think

Finish-lousy aerosol paint

Country of origin USA, Colorado

Weight: varies, depends on what we can find and what you want

Color started out sort of reddish brown, maybe gray

Safeties-None-the darn thing is a ROCK! For crying out loud, what do you want and HK?

Please note: this item, due to its inherently dangerous nature, is not available to: at least the northern portion of the left coast and the land of fruit and nuts (Kalifornia and Ebay). In fact, we highly recommend that those areas IMMEDIATELY begin a program of regulating, stamping out, filing a manufacturer’s class action suit against God,( the original manufacturer), and rendering all non-military or law-enforcement controlled rocks un-useable and ineffective by super gluing them to something solid or crushing them to the size of salt grains. (Any larger and some fool might think to use them in a sling shot!!)

Please Note Again: We recommend against going “air-borne” with your rock unless you are a major league class pitcher or NFL class quarterback. Rocks out of control and personal retention may be easily turned against the original possessor-besides it just shows a lack of self-control.

HURRY!! Get yours soon, as far as we know there are only so many available, and no more are being made that are readily available, although some MAY be evolving (just had to use that word didn’t ya?)

Be sure to check out our other items-sticks, hammers, assault cars, fire-place pokers, screwdrivers, golf clubs, etc.

For Sale: eBay Firearms Sign

Description:

I have been an eBay member for over 10 years, having joined prior to April of 2007, long before the current crop of eBay Executives had even heard of eBay. At that time it was an open, free market but from the very beginning there were rules that prohibited selling illegal items. Everybody got along, and it was FUN to meet new people and buy from them or sell to them. Heck, more than once I have traveled to the eBay campus and participated in usability studies, trying to help eBay make their site better.

Then, suddenly, it became somehow wrong to sell firearms. The category was deleted and any auctions that cropped up in other categories were killed. Suddenly it became “illegal” on eBay to sell perfectly legal items in a perfectly legal manner, i.e. shipping to federally licensed firearms dealers for subsequent transfer. At about the same time as firearms were being banned the plethora of “patent medicines” started cropping up, everything from ointments that claimed to enlarge certain body parts to pills to make the enlargement last longer. Herbal remedies for everything, lack of sleep, loss of energy, you name it. All fraudulent, of course, but still being sold today.

I believe this was the first of many steps down the path of social engineering that eBay has chosen. Today they justify their recent clampdown with, “We have a Trust and Safety team which consists of more than 2,000 experts in online security and safety who are located around the globe.” But back then the Executive Team were at least honest and everyone knew that they were opposed to private ownership of firearms. Implying that their “online security” people have ANY firearms knowledge is like saying that a programmer knows how to run a business.

Further, their experts from “around the globe” are not relevant to America. I don’t really care what someone in Paris, or Lisbon, or London, Tokyo, or Cairo thinks about AMERICAN free enterprise. Just as I don’t care if they ban pork rinds in Saudi Arabia, eBay executives have no business listening to “global” input as it affects the US market.

Below is an exact quotation from the letter sent to me:

“We value an open and transparent marketplace; if items are legal to buy
and sell in an unrestricted manner we allow them on our site. However,
there are some items that while legal, may not be safe for our
marketplace. In these instances, our applicable policies go beyond the
law to ensure that our marketplace is safe.” (Emphasis mine.)

I would like to point out that the first and last sentence are obviously contradictory. You cannot value something, truly value it, and then not honor your own values. What this means is that eBay does NOT place any significant value on an open marketplace, they are simply giving it lip service.

I wonder what eBay does value. For example, do they value the educational fund that one store owner was building for his daughter by selling LEGAL parts? Do they care that they are taking that education from her?

Do they understand that one of the nations finest gunsmiths spent years designing and perfecting a firing pin that will SAVE LIVES by making rifles safer to fire and that he no longer has a “mass market” to sell his product? It is entirely likely that more people will die from “slam fires” that could have been prevented by the use of this improved firing pin. Does eBay care that because of their policy people might actually die?

I don’t know the answers to those questions, and quite honestly I wouldn’t believe any answer provided to me by an eBay executive.

There's always next year

Well, after a strong playoff push, it looks as if the Tribe are officially throwing in the towel.

Indians Sign Branyan

Chicago, IL (Sports Network) - The Cleveland Indians signed infielder Russell Branyan to a minor league contract on Tuesday and assigned him to Triple-A Buffalo.

Branyan started out the season with San Diego and appeared in 61 games, posting a measly .197 average with seven home runs and 19 RBI, but the team released him late in July.

He is a career .229 hitter and has amassed 118 homers, 293 RBI, 88 doubles and 253 runs in a 10-year career with Cleveland, Cincinnati, Milwaukee, Tampa Bay, and San Diego.

The Tiarht Amendment

Don't know if you've seen anything about this.

The Tiarht Amendment has been a perfect example of how media outlets can put forth blatant lies about firearm issues and get away with it. Many, many newspapers wrote scathing editorials and articles about this piece of legislation. Despite all of that, the Amendment passed because legislators understood it to be common sense protection that was demanded by the people.


Background

The Tiarht Amendment was proposed to stop self-appointed nannies like NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg and liberal anti-gun think tanks posing as university researchers from their latest attempt to rid our country of firearm ownership. Since gun bans and ammo regulations haven't been working for them the past few years, they've had to think outside the box for how to get around the Second Amendment. Their answer? Frivolous Civil Lawsuits!

These anti-gun zealots, who are NOT law enforcement officials, took it upon themselves to try and find out where guns used in crimes were originally sold. It's important to note that these original sales were completely legal... otherwise, laws already on the books would have been broken. But like I said, they had to create a convoluted work-around.

Bloomberg and his deceptive cronies were suing gun shops and original owners in civil court over crimes that involved handguns that were either legally sold five or six times after they left the shop or just plain stolen in home robberies and used illegally years later. Is this really about justice? Of course not. The original shops and owners did nothing wrong. This is only about litigating gun shops out of business by forcing them to pay costly legal fees. Mom and Pop shops can't compete with limitless funds from NYC tax coffers.

Imagine that you legally sold a car in 1997. That car has legally been bought and sold ten times since then and was unfortunately used in a bank robbery last week. Then you get sued. Sound about right?

Anyway, you'll read below a very typical rant about the Tiarht Amendment and my response that was published in the same paper. It's important to note that the Editorial staff of the Hamilton News Journal either was completely ignorant about this legislation, or they were purposely lying to their readers.

The Amendment in no way hinders criminal investigations like they claim. It merely ensures that private information can stay out of the hands of those that have no use for it except for abuse. It's also important to note in my rebuttal who is in support of the Tiarht Amendment. The Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms, and Explosives (BATFE). You know that this has to be good legislation because there is certainly no love lost between firearm owners and the BATFE.


Hamilton News Journal Misleading Drivel:

Keeping Gun Data Secret is Criminal

There is nothing the National Rifle Association's lobbying arm won't say or do to protect manufacturers and dealers of guns recovered at crime scenes. In fact, it hasn't had to say much as red-meat Republicans and weak-kneed Democrats flock to aid its cynical cause.

Nothing illustrates this more than what has come to be known as the Tiahrt Amendment — and the shameless debate about it in the U.S. House of Representatives last week...

The amendment greatly restricts federal law enforcement agencies' ability to share information about guns recovered in criminal investigations. Before its passage, federal gun data had been used by researchers at top universities studying violent crime. It also shined an unflattering light on the gun industry...

When cities filed lawsuits against manufacturers and dealers, alleging they knew or should have known their guns were being used in criminal enterprises, the NRA swooped in...

The reality is that police chiefs across the nation (including in Cincinnati, Cleveland and Toledo) have been lobbying for reversal of the Tiahrt amendment. They dispute every point made by the NRA, and argue that gun data can be released in ways that protect lawful gun owners' privacy, prevent disclosure of sensitive law enforcement information and still render the data useful in reining in rogue gun dealers.

Local law enforcement agencies may use gun-trace data when related to specific cases under investigation. But they can't share the data with other agencies except in limited circumstances. And they can't look at the bigger picture so they can understand who's selling large quantities of weapons used to commit crimes.

The House debate last week was a charade. Politicians from both parties eagerly mouthed the NRA's talking points. Committee Chairman David Obey, D-Wisc., talked tough about advocates from both sides, suggesting that they act "like adults rather than thugs." Then he voted against opening up the data...

It was pathetic. The majority of members used a phoney case to curry favor and
avoid attack by the NRA. They put their political convenience ahead of public safety.

My Response:

Amendment Does Not Help Criminals

I am writing to correct many erroneous statements in the July 24 editorial opinion entitled "Keeping Gun Data Secret is Criminal" that discusses the Tiahrt Amendment for preservation of the privacy rights of law-abiding firearm owners that have not committed a crime.

Your editorial's opinion is that the U.S. House of Representatives "eagerly mouthed the NRA's talking points." That's difficult to substantiate, since many constituents, like myself, urged their representatives to support the Tiarht Amendment. This was a case of representatives listening to the people.

I also find it rather ironic that the editorial mentioned the phrase "talking points" at all since your piece did a fair job of merely repeating false anti-gun rhetoric in alleging that the amendment "greatly restricts federal law enforcement agencies' ability to share information about guns recovered in criminal investigations." This is not the case and is easily proven if one actually takes a few minutes to read the amendment.

The FY 2007 version of the Tiahrt Amendment ensures that trace data is available to federal, state and local agencies "in connection with and for use in a bona fide criminal investigation or prosecution" or for use in administrative actions by the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms, and Explosives. That is a direct quote from the legislation.

Also, your editorial listed as many as three individual police chiefs in opposition to the Tiahrt Amendment. That is certainly interesting, but not as interesting as the fact that the Fraternal Order of Police, the world's largest organization of sworn law enforcement officers, join the BATFE in support of it.

I respect the preferences of those two collective groups more than a few rogue individuals. A strongly worded letter of support can be found on the FOP Web site.

The truth is that the Tiarht Amendment merely protects against witch hunts meant to seek out and harass law-abiding gun owners that have done nothing wrong. It does nothing to impede criminal investigations.

The FOP letter of support I referenced can be read HERE.

An editorial from the Toledo Blade with the same blatant lies can be read HERE.

Same story from the Columbus Dispatch can be read HERE.

Both of those newspapers chose not to print my response. Wouldn't want those pesky facts to get in the way of a misleading, biased rant.