What Really Grinds My Gears - Part 3

You know what really grinds my gears?

When football commentators say, "The defense has been on the field a long time. This is like the 53rd consecutive play. They must really be getting tired out there." As if this is some great thing for the offense and a score is guaranteed. Well let me tell you something, Mr. Madden... You may look like a football, but you haven't convinced me that you know anything about the sport that uses a football. And not the gay-ass round football you find over in Socialist countries that wear berets and eat trumpets with their tea. I'm talking about a real football! A sporting object that's made from the hide of wild boars. With laces so white you thought they were made of authentic politician teeth.

Anyway, the offense has participated in just as many plays as the defense, and are equally tired. Only you never hear about what pussies they are during a long drive.

And that, folks, is what really grinds my gears.